One Scoop or Two?

Certain governments have recently taken stances on the trustworthiness of Chinese telecommunications businesses: the US a hard line; the UK a partnership. However, perhaps both this pessimism and this optimism are directed toward the wrong target. Perhaps the spying is more subtle and against a different target. Each of the cat litter trays we've bought … Continue reading One Scoop or Two?

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Twelve Rules for Life in an Uncaring Cosmos

All who bear the burden of unholy knowledge know that Yog-Sothoth, the gate and the key, is perceived in congruence, and that the reasoned half of the mind is our protection from horrific truths. Thus, when I encountered a headline about a forthcoming Lovecraftian project and read the producer not as Jordan Peele but as … Continue reading Twelve Rules for Life in an Uncaring Cosmos

The IllumiNightie

Are you concerned about secret conspiracies not having enough fun? Do you think "They" are bored while watching you? If you answered Yes to either of these questions, you need The IllumiNightie. Unlike ordinary nighties, The IllumiNightie has an all-encompassing hood featuring the all-seeing eye so you too can look like a gentle pastiche of … Continue reading The IllumiNightie

This Is My Stop

In public transport as in so many other areas, I favour multi-sided, organic, and nuanced over sterile pseudo-utility. There's a bus stop outside the Burger King near my house. The advertisement on the end has changed several times since we moved, but it's always been for McDonalds. Which caused my wife and I to wonder, … Continue reading This Is My Stop

Clawing Back Sanity

The home and garden centre around the corner has one stand of Halloween decorations but half a floor of Christmas paraphernalia. The carols have started. The online retailers have started their reminders to shop early. With only the Conservative Party Conference remaining true to the mix of horror and hearkening back to a mythical past … Continue reading Clawing Back Sanity

Is a Vampire’s Castle His?

Law and popular culture are filled with examples of persons having total authority over their own property. Which raises the question whether a vampire requires permission to enter the house that they owned while a human. First, obviously, my thoughts are entirely hypothetical and not legal advice. Anyone considering vampirism should seek a specialist in … Continue reading Is a Vampire’s Castle His?

Pulping the Classics

I had a conversation over the weekend about whether certain genres need to be about particular things or whether they can be an aesthetic. And, as is common with discussion of genre boundaries, the discussion soon sent out a tendril into the field of literature vs. genre fiction. While the difference—if any—between literary and genre … Continue reading Pulping the Classics

Pause For Nuanced Effect

Through the vagaries of the Internet, this article proposing new punctuation marks floated across my section of the aether. While the article is satire, the underlying issue of miscommunication is very real. In the spirit of which, I'd like to propose three useful signifiers of my own. The Seriousicon A symbol for indicating that one … Continue reading Pause For Nuanced Effect