Are you concerned about secret conspiracies not having enough fun? Do you think “They” are bored while watching you?
If you answered Yes to either of these questions, you need The IllumiNightie.
Unlike ordinary nighties, The IllumiNightie has an all-encompassing hood featuring the all-seeing eye so you too can look like a gentle pastiche of the Illuminati symbol while you sleep.
No more worries about the hidden masters choosing to spy on some other human sleeping. No more wondering whether they are actually out there any more.
Because in today’s cut-throat social media driven world, the only thing worse than “Them” watching you is if they aren’t.
And if your immortal stalker sort-of-boyfriend is out-of-town or you want to breathe, simply remove the hood and use The IllumiNightie as standard night wear.
Available in White, Fake Newsprint and Limited Edition Dollar-Bill Green.
Order now and receive a complimentary copy of “Subtle Sounds for Surveillance: 101 songs guaranteed to reduce the stress levels of anyone watching you”.